It came to the point this week where I faced the challenge of preparing my novel for print.
The process made me twitch a bit. On two levels.
First, the technical process. Lulu, the self-publishing service I have decided to go with, has the pixel equivelant of reams and reams of advice, of how to, of what to, of when to.
Honestly, it's a bit of a headf*ck. I'm the kind of person who learns from doing and from being told, I like to have someone to show me how to do these things. Yeah, quite a challenge for the part of me that still dreams of an editor/publisher organising all this for me.
Secondly, I'm aware that I am the only proper critic for my novel. I'm not sure why this is. My friends have busy lives. My husband said in March, when I completed it, how he couldn't wait to read it. He's busy too.
It's more than tempting to spend time in a funk, convincing myself they haven't got the time because they think it won't be worth their time. Maybe they do think that. At the end, I suppose, we're on our own in this. Are we strong enough to take the next steps without aid and support?
My brief sojourn into HarperCollins' Authonomy was ... interesting, I did get some useful feedback on my first 10,000 words but it's a massive time-waster - what do you mean, it's polite to reciprocate reviews? I haven't got all day to sit reading other people's stuff when I should be looking at my own.
So, I am seeking to publish a story that nobody else had read from start to finish. Meeps. I am relying upon my own judgement, my own skills. What are these skills and how did I get them? Well, as a journalist I understand ruthless editing, for a start. That's a professional skill: HURRAH!
Nothing remains that should be culled, I'm fairly sure not much has sneaked through in that respect. But what about my characters, my pace, my resolution?
Prepping my manuscript for print was an exercise in self-belief. And again, I can't stress how the process of creating the file for my A5 paperback gave me that sense of making my dream real. I had done everything I knew, and everything on the Lulu checklist and it still didn't look right. I compared it to a paperback copy of The Road Less Travelled by M. Scott Peck, which is roughly the same size. Then I realised - margins! Once I had adjusted these, it resembled ... a book!
I've stopped twitching, for now.
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